Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Losing Means Winning.

With all the talk about my constant weight gain/loss struggles that have recently dominated my blog, my dad decided to throw the gauntlet down by proposing a challenge:

Considering that there are 28 days left for your trip and you must be by now about 10 lbs overweight, I propose the following:

1) Every 3 days you must lose 1 lb, so by April 6 you'll have lost 9 lbs.
2) For every pound you lose I will send you an email glorifying Wilt Chamberlain as the greatest ever. I know it will hurt me so much to have to lie and bring myself to such a low level of degradation, but it will help your cause. Of course, you better be telling the truth, because I can't see you.
3) If you've been lying to me about your weight my only condition to get compensated is to have you wear a Michael Jordan T-Shirt when you get here..

Deal... or no deal?"

So I responded with this:

In a message dated 3/10/2009, AlexGonzalez0709 writes:

"I weigh 169 now. So perfect. I will start today, and by April 6, I must weigh no more than 160. What kind of scale do you have? I would prefer a neutral site for weighing. Oh, and by the way, the 169 is totally bare. So I will say that with tshirt & shorts, and socks I am probably about 170, that would make me have to weigh 161 or less to win. I am going to the gym tonight. So get your homage to Wilt the Stilt ready!"

And then got this....


"160 or less, or nothing. No clothes gimmicks or any other bullshit excuse...160 or less.
My scale is perfectly well calibrated and leveled. I don't cheat with my weight."

For all these years, I refuse to recognize Michael Jordan. I do this partially, because it drives my father mad. To me, Jordan's just that dude that paid Juanita Jordan like, what, $500 million for divorce? So, when my father challenges me the way he did, it's because he thinks that he has just as much a shot in winning the bet, as I do to show him up. Challenge accepted.

Further to that, here was a little IM exchange that took place since the emails...

AlexGonzalez0709: Hey, I got your response. Question....Is 160.8 considered 160? what kind of a scale do you have?
AlexGonzalez0709 is it a digital scale?
DAGONAZ: that's considered 161
AlexGonzalez0709 what about 160.4
AlexGonzalez0709 160.5
AlexGonzalez0709 160.51
AlexGonzalez0709 160.500000000000001
AlexGonzalez0709 okay so 160.5 or less
AlexGonzalez0709 that will at least take my clothes into consideration, as I am not going to weigh myself in front of your or anyone bareback!
DAGONAZ but my scale has to show 160
DAGONAZ digital
DAGONAZ no decimal shown
AlexGonzalez0709 okay
DAGONAZ get to it!
AlexGonzalez0709 thats not too fair though
AlexGonzalez0709 if i put something on your scale that weighs 6 ounces, i bet it wont say 0 pounds
DAGONAZ do you think it is fair for me to break my principles and admit that number 6 is number 1?
AlexGonzalez0709 6 OUNCES out of 16 OUNCES should round down to zero, otherwise I won't benefit from 160.5 being 160.
AlexGonzalez0709in other words, there is no rounding accountability without decimals
DAGONAZ anything under 1 pound ahows 0
AlexGonzalez0709 okay. so as long as you said it, you have certified it.
AlexGonzalez0709: anything else is a breach of contract
DAGONAZ: i am notary public. i cannot lie under the laws of Governor Chris
AlexGonzalez0709 The Challenge has begun and I expect your first homage to Wilt Chamberlain tonight when I come back from the gym!
DAGONAZ: we shall see if you really are telling the truth
AlexGonzalez0709 and if i lose 2 pounds in one shot, then you have to say 2 things about Wilt Chamberlain being the greatest basketball player ever. do we have a deal?
AlexGonzalez0709 i will take a picture of my on the scale before i go to the gym tonight.
DAGONAZ: no changing the rules. what it is its what it is.
AlexGonzalez0709 and post it on my blog. this will be a public challenge!
DAGONAZ: then when you get here you can get back to pigland.
AlexGonzalez0709 hopefully not!
DAGONAZ: agree, but the temptation will be great with my culinary abilities
DAGONAZ: supported with cristina's cuban cooking
DAGONAZ: your determination will be tested.
AlexGonzalez0709 i will win.
AlexGonzalez0709 i will perservere.
AlexGonzalez0709 relentless!
DAGONAZ: Chicken Piccata, Barbeque, Spanish Tortilla, Cocido madrileƱo, etc etc
AlexGonzalez0709 i will just have to stay away from pizza. that's all.
DAGONAZ: bistec empanizado with frijoles and arroz blanco,mmmm!
AlexGonzalez0709 yah yah yah,. whatevah!
DAGONAZ: hahahaha
DAGONAZ: ok, now that you got a preview of your torment to come, i have to sign out

He is, of course, talking about the good Spanish and Cuban food that they make in their home.
My kids and I will be spending some time there coming up. Retired people love to cook. In a morbid way, I am challenging myself to lose weight now to , and as he has mentioned, put it back on later.

I am already off to a bad start. Lunch consisted of a bologna sandwich, and Breakfast a paltry bowl of Total with skim milk. However, 1 bag of cheetos, 1 package of Starburst, and 1 Milky Way bar. No doubt I will be hitting the treadmill tonight.....

Come back later for the picture of my feet on the scale prior to running tonight.

1 comment:

DGA said...

Next time you take a picture of your feet i suggest you wear socks.